Knowing how to overcome fear is a must-have for all humans, not a should-have or a could-have. The reason for that first statement is that many things in life will attempt to scare you and kick you down.
But if you know how to overcome fear, regardless of whatever it may be about, all that is left would be to use that knowledge to your advantage.
First, I must warn you that positive results may not happen overnight, but your effort will pay off with consistent baby steps soon enough.
Fear has crippled many people and has driven many into their shells. Whether it is the fear of loneliness, rejection, change, failure, uncertainty as to what the future holds, being judged or even of something terrible happening, they all have a similar impact on us.
So if we agree that fear isn’t something we should embrace, then the following reasonable question deserves an excellent answer: how should we overcome such fears?
My goal is to open you up to helpful tips to aid you in overcoming fear as you journey through life. But before that, let’s consider a few things related to this subject matter.
What Are Fear And Anxiety
Fear and anxiety are what I’d like to call relatives because they are interrelated. Therefore, it is somewhat impossible to discuss fear and not mention anxiety. Fear is an unpleasant emotion we experience, and it is caused by threats of danger to our physical or even emotional well-being.
Although fear and anxiety aren’t the same, our bodies and brains react similarly to both threats. In such cases, it is safe to say it makes no difference whether the threat is physical, social, or emotional. Once the danger is perceived, the alarm bells go off ringing.
It will interest you to know that fear can be healthy sometimes. In fact, fear is a healthy response in our flight or fight response to keep us safe, alive, and thriving as we journey on earth.
In other words, it is programmed into our nervous system and gives us the survival instincts to keep ourselves safe from danger.
But, on the other hand, fear can be unhealthy when it makes you more cautious than you need to be to stay safe and prevents you from doing things you would otherwise enjoy. Furthermore, when constant fear prevents you from living life to the fullest, it becomes anxiety.
To many people, anxiety looks very much like fear on the surface. And as I stated earlier, they are interrelated, which also means they are rooted in the same emotion.
But anxiety occurs when fear becomes maladaptive. Maladaptive is the psychological term for when a normal response gets out of control. So in other words, anxiety is when the fear response is out of control.
While fear is an emotion people experience regularly, anxiety should not be an everyday thing. Simply put, anxiety is a mental health disorder, and fear is an emotion.
However, anxiety symptoms persist and often must be managed with medication and therapy. On the other hand, the symptoms of fear go away on their own when the danger disappears.
Another striking difference is in their symptoms. Fear and anxiety symptoms overlap in many ways, but the reasons they occur differ. Nevertheless, both anxiety and fear indeed trigger the body’s stress response.
However, another significant difference is fear typically occurs in the face of real, tangible, or immediate threats. In contrast, anxiety occurs in response to imagined danger.
Also, anxiety can be ever-present, while fear is mostly a short-lived reaction. Additionally, both share physical sensations like, muscle tension, a cold chill, a racing heart, and an increased breathing rate. And all of those are a part of the body’s fight-or-flight response.
Now that we have briefly discussed fear and anxiety and some of their symptoms, let’s share a few tips on how to overcome fear.
1. Get Help
One of the first things to do in your battle to overcome fear is to seek help. But unfortunately, we live in a world where people feel embarrassed asking for help because they feel it makes them look weak in the face of others.
It is so unfortunate that this is the mindset many people have. And it seems to some that society applauds when one is self-sufficient regarding matters relating to life.
But this ought not to be so. No matter who you are or what you do, you sometimes need a helping hand. So ask for help not because you are weak but because you want to remain strong and healthy.
There are a variety of options to choose from when taking this route. However, you must remember that if you don’t seek help, you may never know how to overcome fear and anxiety. And of the saddest things is to live with both all your life because such a fellow will never reach their full potential.
You could seek professional help by seeing a therapist to help you walk through your struggles. And if it is a mental health disorder or challenge, medication will be given to you.
On the other hand, talking with trusted folks, preferably those who have faced that challenge in their life, will also be of great help because they would understand your struggle, narrate their success story with you and help you navigate through that troubled time.
Also, you could join a support community or seek online resources to help you conquer your fears.
When it comes to such vital matters, there should be no shame in seeking help because failure to do so may result in more complications for you. So how to overcome anxiety and fear is to get help.
2. Visualize Success
Most of our fears are often deeply rooted in questions we have no answers to. For instance, what will be the outcome of this business deal? Will I ever get married and have kids of my own? Where will I get the funds I need to start my company? Will my application get accepted or rejected by the firm? And the list goes on and on.
Again, it is easier for us to ponder about these things, but one thing is that we may not have it all figured out yet or, better still, have the answers we would like to hear.
In this phase, some migrate into unfriendly zones that will cripple them because they give room for unhealthy emotions to take the wheel.
So, have you thought about taking a different approach? Too often than not, we focus more on what could go wrong. It is almost like we are wired to look for faults and not focus on our strengths.
If you look for many reasons to be scared, life will give you countless reasons. But, at the same time, our strength should be our advantage. However, this is in no wise advocating neglecting the reality of things.
Listen, as far as you can see is how far you will go. But, of course, fear will show itself in the form of second thoughts or even assume the form of doubt.
But it would help if you remembered that your mind is powerful and what you allow is what will persist and eventually become your reality.
So, all I am saying is to visualize success over that particular fear instead of imagining failure. Conquering fear can be easy if you do this.
So visualize your goal already completed and ask yourself, what will success look like? Or how good will that feel? This will bring positive feelings and confidence to execute your strategies for overcoming fears. And ultimately, bring you to a place of victory and success.
3. Accept That You Will Fail
The thought of failure has crippled many more than failure itself. So once they entertain that thought, they immediately accept defeat even before trying, which has killed many good dreams.
Do you think successful people in any field, career or even in romantic relationships like marriages don’t fail? Of course, they all fail, but they refuse to allow that moment to define the rest of their life, career or marriage.
But unfortunately, this is where many choose to remain. They supposedly find comfort in the fact that they tried, and because they failed at the first attempt, they let it go.
Accepting that one could fail at the first or even several trials at something shouldn’t deter you from still having a winning mentality. I am saying that you should only make room for reality to unfold as you journey.
And you may not like to hear this, but failing doesn’t make you a failure, and it is even a better teacher than success. You only become a failure when you refuse not to get up.
So, instead of doing all that, why not learn from those experiences so that you will overcome whatever obstacle hindered you the first time on your next attempt? In other words, how you respond will set you apart from the crowd.
Finally, on this point, if you accept from the onset that failure is an inevitable part of success, you’ll be less afraid of it. A
nd remember that everyone who has ever attempted something new failed at some point before they eventually became successful.
4. Surround Yourself With Success
It will interest you to know that who you surround yourself with significantly impacts how you view yourself or what you turn out to be because you will become like the people you allow into your space.
Unfortunately, too many times, we surround ourselves with people who make us feel comfortable in our mediocrity. Or people who tell us why we can’t achieve that goal, and so we buy that idea.
Sadly, telling a great vision to a small mind might discourage you because they might talk you out of it if you are not strong enough.
Stop being around people who feed your fear, whether they are friends or colleagues or even family members. Remember that birds of the same feather flock together, so you must apply wisdom not to offend them. Instead, surround yourself with successful people who have success stories to share.
Never forget that your mind will only give you what you have fed it. Are you still thinking of how to overcome fear? If so, start by changing your environment.
5. Identify Your Fears
This may take some time, but ultimately, it will be worth it. Have you really sat down and thought about what your fears are deeply rooted in? This might require you to dig into your past for justice to be done because without knowing its source, it may be impossible to conquer that fear. So, again I ask you, what is your fear profoundly rooted in?
Learning how to overcome fear is like any problem-solving challenge. However, before that problem is solved, one must identify the challenge to conquer it.
And failure to do so will result in the cycle repeating itself. Also, you could define it, which is another way of identifying it.
Defining it will help reveal a lot about why you have those fears and help you determine the next action to take to overcome them.
So, as I stated earlier, sit in a quiet place and observe your thoughts, bodily sensations and feelings too. Also, you might want to take a book and pen along with you to write down things you discover.
6. Practice Gratitude
Another way of overcoming your fears is to practice gratitude. When one negative emotion takes the wheel in your life, more negative ones will join the party in no distant time.
This suggests why happy people easily anger people who aren’t happy. For instance, have you ever heard someone ask why another person is so happy? If you look closely, the person asking may be at a bad place in life and see no reason why that other person should be happy, so they get pissed at that person’s happiness.
So instead of letting negative emotions take the wheel, replace them with positive ones. I have learned that fear and gratitude cannot exist in the same space.
And an excellent place to start your journey is by being thankful regardless of your situation. One hard pill to swallow is that life sometimes gives you countless reasons not to practice gratitude.
However, it would be best if you never settled to accept that. So one way to learn how to overcome fear is to be thankful for the good things and how far you have come.
Trust me; it will drown fear. This will immensely help replace negative emotions with positive ones.
7. Release Control
When it comes to learning to release control, many people find it challenging to do that. And once a person is trapped here, there will always be one reason or another to be afraid because many things are beyond our control.
As a result, some feel that being a control freak helps them manage their fears. But in reality, being a control freak has no place when learning how to overcome fear.
In a bid to want to control their fear, they try to control everything. So if you understand what that statement meant and can relate to it, it’s time to release control and try a different approach.
Fear results in controlling behaviour, and when you don’t get what you want, guess what? It intensifies your fears more. So instead of controlling your fear, it makes you the victim and controls you.
As I stated earlier, things will always be beyond your control. However, with careful planning and consideration before taking action, you will eventually be okay.
Finally, remember that you control your decisions, but you may not always have control over situations that will come your way, nor can you control how others may act. Knowing and acknowledging this will be the beginning of a peaceful life.
8. Recite Positive Affirmations
Have you ever thought of this before? It would help if you didn’t underestimate the power of words, especially the ones you tell yourself.
What other people tell you may or may not be as vital as what you tell yourself. So, for example, people may say to you that you aren’t going to amount to anything in the future. To be honest, that is a hurtful comment and can cause damage, but what is more important in such times is what you tell yourself.
Daily load yourself with positively loaded phrases or statements to challenge negative and unhelpful thoughts or comments from people.
Use them to motivate yourself, combat fear, and boost your self-esteem. This can be an effective tool for overcoming your fear if practised often.
9. Overcome Fear By Facing It
Most people would run all their lives instead of facing their fears, and once you do this, you will never know how to overcome fear. We think that just because we ignore it, it might magically disappear.
But sorry to burst your bubble; any neglected issue is an ongoing reality waiting to happen someday. Unless you decide to face it, you will never conquer that fear. Nelson Mandela once said, “the brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
So once you have decided it is time you faced it head on, devise and stick to a plan of action — this is undoubtedly part of your personal growth and will only make you stronger. And that’s how to overcome fear.
10. Have A Positive Attitude
A positive attitude and mindset are paramount when learning how to overcome fear because failure to have those will only repeat a cycle of pain and fear.
So having a positive attitude means being optimistic about situations and yourself. I know situations will try to tell you otherwise, but you must remain resolute and choose positivity over all forms of negativity.
Also, when you do embrace such, you will remain hopeful and see the best, even under challenging circumstances.
Life’s beauty is knowing that tough and uncertain times never last, no matter how ugly things may be now.
So, in other words, a positive attitude will help you get through the entire process and could be your lucky break to conquer your fears. Finally, on this point, remember to have only positive expectations.
11. Stop Feeding The Fear
Whatever isn’t fed will eventually die. So, if I may ask, in what way are you directly or indirectly feeding your fears? It will continue to flourish and grow if you don’t stop providing it with the necessary nutrients for survival. So, you will need to understand what it feeds on because knowing that is how to overcome fear.
If you notice that your fear is fed by all the negative things happening on the news, stop listening to such reports.
Unfortunately, countless times we consume thousands of negative messages daily. So, instead of that, change your channel to something better. In other words, prohibit negativity from entering the temple of your focused and vibrant mind.
12. A Supportive Family To Overcome Fear
One of the best things anyone could ask for is a loving, caring and supportive family. Regardless of what you might be going through or what your fears are, knowing that your family will be there for you is a beautiful thought to lean on and find the faith to keep moving on.
Even when you choose not to open up or pretend everything is fine, a good family will discern that all isn’t well. And, of course, they will support you as you navigate through the troubled waters of life. How to overcome fear can be less frightening if you have a supportive family.
13. Take Action To Overcome Fear
No matter how good your therapist may be or how supportive your friends or family may be, you may never overcome your fears, let alone think of facing them, if you don’t take the necessary actions.
Likewise, things we want to change will only change if we take the steps needed. Your therapist may advise on what to do, but if you don’t do them, nothing will change.
So, in the end, taking action is just as important as having a caring family, supportive friends, or even a good therapist.
14. Having Faith Can Overcome Fear
Having faith that things will work out, in the end is also essential as long as you do what should be done. Shall we think back to a few years ago, please? Did the fear you had six years ago come true? Chances are it did, or perhaps it didn’t.
However, the bottom line is that you made it, so why not have faith that things will go fine? So often, much of our worries are about the future, and nothing ruins a person more than that.
But I know faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. And provided you are taking the right steps daily, eventually, you will be okay.
So trust and have faith that things will be okay and let go of logic and reason. Just suspend your cynical mind and, again, I say, believe.
15. Happy Memories Can Overcome Fear
Never underestimate the power of what remembering happy memories can do. It is a very effective tool for overcoming fears. Interestingly, thinking about a happy moment can warm our hearts, soothe fearful thoughts and even nourish the soul.
So instead of focusing on the negatives, remember fun memories from your childhood that can make a dark day bright again.
No matter how things may be, try to get in touch with peace because it is one of the things that conquer fear.
Besides, fear must be defeated, and it may not be by bold steps initially but by the slightest changes in our minds dripping like water on a hard surface a little each day.
And we should never forget that consistency is key in this journey. Finally, we can’t live a life of purpose when ruled by fear, so it is essential to note that, too.
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