In today’s article, we will be looking at “what to do when he ignores you” because being ignored by your partner can be annoying and painful.
It could lead to unhappiness and even depression in some cases. A lot of thoughts would flood your mind as soon as the situation lingers on for some time. What could I have done? Am I less attractive? Could he be cheating?
Many questions will be left unanswered as you search for the right answers and sadly, you may not find the answers you desire instantly.
Other times, the answers lie with the one who ignored you. Of course, it is normal for you to think of how to make him regret ignoring you when you’re not getting his attention after several trials.
Just before taking that step, ask yourself, “Is this the best move for me now?” The answer is within you.
You’ve got to try to make him yours again and if you’re thinking of ways to, read my article 11 Ways To Make A Guy That Used To Like You Again for a better understanding, and hopefully, that will help.
What to do when he ignores you isn’t a problem because I’ll be giving you some steps to take. However, before I give you my thoughts on what to do when he ignores you, have you thought of some possible reasons behind his action? Let’s explore a few.
Possible Reasons Why He Is Ignoring You
1. Probably because he needs space. Some men are fond of this and this includes women too. As soon as they feel they need space, they ignore you completely. Well, this isn’t going to help the matter.
2. He might be angry with you about something. A bit childish, right? Whatever happened to “we will talk things through when situations like this come knocking?”
Well, this is how some men choose to process issues because they feel it’s the best way for them in other not to say hurtful things. In other words, this is their coping mechanism. I hope he is open to changing his character.
3. He wants to break up. This is a classic move that has proven to be successful for them over the years. Yes, some women use this move too. I need not say more.
4. He just might be dealing with some personal issues. This statement is a bit debatable. Shouldn’t he be able to share them with you as his spouse?
5. He might be cheating on you. Some feel guilty as soon as they are done cheating. So since they can’t look into your eyes right away, they then decide to ignore you to feel okay before coming back. But do they ever feel better?
6. Probably, he wasn’t really into you, to begin with.
However, it is important not to jump to conclusions just yet. You need to find out the specific reason for this new behavior because it is one of the ways on how to get him interested again fast.
I know you might be angry at the whole situation but try and exercise some patience. Below are vital things to do when your man ignores you.
1. Assess The Situation
What to do when he ignores you would be to first assess the entire situation. This is deep because his change of attitude could have been altered by anything.
Sometimes, it could be from you or some other place or person. What this means is that not every change of attitude has to do with something you did. Nevertheless, you must examine everything that you can think of.
His action could be rooted maybe in a disagreement or fight you guys had and afterward, he felt some sort of resentment towards you.
And rather than talking about things, he chose to ignore you completely. That’s one possible scenario and if you don’t understand that this is his reason for ignoring you, you might have all the wrong thoughts in your mind.
- Nevertheless, you must examine everything that you can think of.
This will not come overnight and I need you to get that straight. It’s going to need you to think deep in some cases.
However, ignore the use of your emotions while doing this because our judgment at the end of the day could be clouded by our emotions. Honestly, that’s the last thing you need to get in the way of your task.
2. Try Other Forms Of Communication
This is important and it shouldn’t be overlooked. Why? This has proven to be an effective tool over time.
Communication is key and we know this to be true so why stop trying to reach him? You can only know what the matter is by having a dialogue with him, however, this may not yield the expected result on the first attempt but that doesn’t mean you abort the mission.
You are on a mission to get him to respond so if you’ve tried one method and it is proving ineffective, simply resort to a different approach. Maybe, it might help.
For instance, if you’ve been texting and he’s not replying to any of your messages, perhaps you could opt to call him. Anything could have made him not reply to your text and that may include his busy schedule at work.
You never can tell. You should be able to tell when he’s free or busy, again you could leave a message or decide to call. If he is receptive to this, then he was not ignoring you. Lest I forget, your patience will be tested.
You could also do things the old-fashioned way; letter writing. Carefully penning down your thoughts in your handwriting will convey a strong message to him and I hope he gets it.
3. Call Out His Behaviour
Are you still thinking of what to do when he ignores you? Think no further. Stand and speak up! This is a boss move and I’ll tell you why.
Many ladies won’t take this step and the reason is they feel once they do this, he would feel offended. Hold up, I didn’t say harass him neither did I say embarrass him in public.
Calling out his behavior doesn’t necessarily mean you go over to his place, stand at the top of his car, and shout, “Hey! What’s wrong with you man?! You’ve been acting like a coward! Tired of the relationship?” Lord knows if I had a girl do that to me, I’m going to end my relationship with her as soon as she gets down from the top of my car.
I’ve noticed that the tone and manner we use to speak to people matter a lot. Sometimes, what we say isn’t bad but our delivery can make it all look bad, and that will make it all unaccepted even if we mean well.
In essence, what I’m saying is that you talk to your partner in a responsible and respected manner. Your manner of approach is essential in getting him back.
Once you feel like he is ignoring you, try speaking about it to him. You could go over to his place or have him come over to yours. You could start by saying, “Hey, you’ve been acting distant these days and I’d like to know what’s wrong because I can’t keep up with this new you.” That is what to do when he ignores you.
You just indirectly told him about his new behavior and how it is affecting you negatively. Very thoughtful because the message further conveys a sense of thoughtfulness and a plea to change.
However, this doesn’t indicate any form of desperation nor doesn’t it sound accusatory. If it does sound like an accusation, he could go into defense mode and that’s the last thing needed at this stage of the journey.
4. Let Him Be For Some Days
There are other reasons to do this but the sole aim is to give him some time to cool off. If you have just had a serious argument or fight, some people might prefer for you not to blow up their phone with calls or messages just yet.
Not while they are still mad, perhaps, for some people the more you call or text, the further away they go. So he might be ignoring you to get his feelings under control.
Giving him that much-needed space will let him know that you are being supportive and when he is ready to talk, you are too.
Meanwhile, as you are giving him some time to go through his feelings or whatever might be the issue, make sure that you are keeping yourself busy with other things and also making yourself happy.
Failure to do so will mean you will be with your phone 24/7 and that is what we are trying to avoid. So, avoid being too close to your phone so that you don’t find yourself calling or texting him.
Checking your phone will not make things any better because you might end up ringing him because of the anxiety you are feeling.
However, staying with people you love will help you feel better and happier and that’s what’s needed. So spend some time with your people instead of feeling alone.
Perhaps, your spouse might be the type who loves to have you around all the time, so, take this time to be a precious one that you could use to sit around people you love or even a time you can spend wholly on yourself, you know, showing care for yourself.
Treat yourself to some delicious and healthy food and just enjoy the joy that comes at the moment.
5. Ignore His Calls And Texts
You could also choose to ignore his calls and texts without feeling any form of pressure to call or text him back.
Well, this step should be taken when he finally starts calling you and not when his wounds are still fresh.
By doing this, you just gave him a dose of his medicine so he will feel what you felt while you were trying to get his attention.
But try not to overdo it before it turns into an endless cycle because your relationship will be boring.
- This step should be taken when he finally starts calling you and not when his wounds are still fresh.
It’s difficult to see a text from your boo and not want to return the message instantly or even call him right back, but you’ve got to pretend like you didn’t see it.
You could even decide to switch off your phone or put it on airplane mode. Remember how hard it was for you to finally get him to respond again? Yes, now is his turn.
Another reason to consider doing this especially if he ignored you without any heads up is for him not to consider doing this again in the future.
It’s always interesting to see him waiting for your reply and thinking about you too. So if you’re thinking of how to get his attention when he ignores you, you could do this when he sends in a message or calls you.
This is a way to slow things down for some time to make him miss you more. If he was seeing another lady, your lack of returning his calls or texts will prompt him to leave her. That’s how to get his attention back from another woman.
6. Don’t Act Desperate
This might not be easy for some people but for others, this will be a smooth sail.
Sometimes, desperation may scare your boyfriend away and he may misunderstand all you are doing to get him back is just because you love him.
In moments like this, it is wise of you to remain calm and composed. Kind of like I don’t care but hey, I do care, and that’s what to do when he ignores you.
I know you are feeling ignored but if there is a good reason for his action, being desperate will just be an act that will portray you to be insecure and at worst, even crazy and I’m sure you aren’t any of those, so take a chill pill.
Likewise, following him around to badger him will only make you look needy and this will make you look pathetic.
So when your man ignores you, no matter how much it disturbs you, bear in mind that acting desperate will never improve the state of things.
You might be saying, “what if I just decide to send him multiple messages within an hour?” That’s still not accepted. Others might justify this thought by saying well, “I’m not meeting him in person.”
All of these actions will harm the process of trying to get him back.
This may not be what you may like to hear now but I’ll say it. You should not try to convince anyone to commit to a relationship. If the relationship is built this way, they will view it like, they are doing you a favor.
7. Change Your Perspective
What to do when he ignores you is for you to change your perspective before things get back to normal.
A change of your mindset is essential to the success of your relationship because part of the reasons why he chose to ignore you in the first place could be because of this issue.
It is needless for him to come back if the reason he ignored you isn’t fixed because the same issue will reoccur.
Misunderstandings happen even in the healthiest of relationships. Some of the misunderstandings come from inaccurate or incomplete information about a certain issue.
You can do well to remember that and not jump right to conclusions immediately. It is a way of saying, avoid assumptions.
- Also, avoid assuming or putting pieces to a puzzle that doesn’t exist.
Maybe he just got out of a bad relationship and still has some of the troubles from his former relationship disturbing him.
So if one of the struggles he faced was communication issues, it will be more reasonable for you not to jump to conclusions by thinking it has to do with you.
It could also be that another aspect of his life is making him feel overwhelmed. All I’m trying to say is that you may not be the reason he’s behaving this way, so realize that and take a chill pill.
Also, avoid assuming or putting pieces to a puzzle that doesn’t exist.
8. Talk With Other Guys In The MeanTime
It is really difficult to kill time when your man ignores you and all you want to do is call and hear his voice. Well, talking with other guys in the meantime might take your mind off his current behavior and let you have some quality time.
Don’t be afraid to hang out with other guys so long as you’re not doing anything immoral with them. Whether you believe me or not, this often helps. It will help you forget about him and give him more reasons to stop ignoring you.
This will tell him you are really attractive and the sight of other guys around you will have him racing back to you in no time.
Men usually don’t like other guys being around their women, especially if they fought with their women. So if you are thinking of what to do when he ignores your text, hang out with other guys.
It is going to make him say something along the lines of, “the other guy knows that we’re having issues and is seeking to capitalize on it to achieve his mission.” So he will start talking to you again quickly.
However, once you’ve noticed that he’s only interested in you when other guys are around, I’ll suggest you think things through when alone.
9. Be Radiant
The last thing you wouldn’t want to do is look less radiant and I will let you know why. It’s easy to go around looking beat up and dejected simply because your boyfriend ignored you.
What you are saying is if he eventually breaks up with you, you’d be gloomy. Come on! This is the best time for you to be happy about other key achievements in your life than to be sad because a man has decided to ignore you.
When things happen to us that we don’t expect, whether good or bad, our reaction says a lot about our maturity. I want you to respond to his new behavior by being a whole new you with a difference.
Once he sees you are doing great without him, trust me, he will want to come back. Then, it’s going to be up to you to decide whether you want him back or not.
Practice self-care by treating yourself to sumptuous delicacies, exercising, or even traveling for a holiday. The last thing a man wants to see is a lady he’s ignored doing amazingly well.
It’s almost going to be incredible for him to believe. This will also boost your self-esteem. You never know what you can handle unless it comes your way.
10. Find Support For Your Journey
If you are still thinking of what to do when he ignores you, I’d like you to take a deep breath first and know that you will be fine soon.
If you can’t go through this phase of your life alone, it is ok to seek help. This can come in form of therapy, counseling, or even talking to any trusted friend, family member, or even a clergyman.
People who love you will be willing to support you every step of the way. This is their way of telling you that you are not alone and we care for you.
Being ignored without a reason can be very devastating and in other for you not to struggle with self-worth issues or even self-esteem-related problems, I’ll advise you to find support and that’s what to do when he ignores you.
You have just read my thoughts on what to do when he ignores you. Relationships have many ups and downs and this is one of them.
Several married couples have had their share of this issue, however, through conscious trial to make amends, things got better.
So what to do when he ignores you is to try making things better by following the steps I wrote about.
Also, feel free to reassess the whole situation and it is ok to say I deserve to be treated better. Never stay where you are not loved or appreciated.
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